Judgement Day

One of the worst things about being a new mom is realizing how you're slowly but surely doing seemingly everything you swore you'd never do as you observed other moms in your holier than thou pregnancy.

Exhibit A.

These are my favorite pants: Lululemon "still pants". I met a new mom in Patagonia who was wearing them, shortly after I bought mine, and she said an intervention had to be staged because she wore them so often after having her baby. The pants aren't the problem though. The problem is that we have an area rug near the baby area that collects dog hair, and Lululemon pants are like dog hair magnets. Dry leaves too. Literally you can walk down the sidewalk in the fall and in five minutes look like a preschooler's autumn art project from the waist down. So twice lately--okay the past two days because I've been wearing these pants two days straight (and yes, I'm still wearing them now!)--I've walked out of the house like this:

Exhibit B.

I ran out of shampoo at least a week ago, and have been squeezing every last drop of it out of a travel bottle. Now I'm doing the same with conditioner. At this point, I stick my pinky inside the travel bottle to get just enough shampoo to justify calling it "washing" my hair. I just haven't made the effort to go get more with baby in tow. My hair is at what I like to call the "Carrie Bradshaw two-tone look" anyway, so I really need to get it cut and touch up some highlights. Remember when Carrie Bradshaw had half brown hair and half blond, and it was kind of bird's nesty? That's how it gets, but not so much intentionally. And now it's also unwashed.

Exhibit C.

I swore I wouldn't pepper Maya's world with black and white dangly objects. I saw them on car seats, strollers, mobiles, you name it. I thought, isn't the outside world enough entertainment? I mean, she's been in a dark womb the last nine months--a blade of grass should be stimulating enough. But Maya is not a fan of the car seat. She takes after Bailey; they both whine when the car's stopping and going but fall asleep on the interstate. So I caved and bought these admittedly cute little black and white and primary colored bugs that hang on her car seat handle and ring like wind chimes. I don't know if Maya enjoys them or not, but I kind of do. Don't tell anyone.